Fruit-flavored snacks are made with the same wax used on cars.

On a ski lift in Taos, NM: "No jumping from the lift. Survivors will be prosecuted." Official sign near door: Door Alarmed. Handprinted sign nearby: Window frightened. Road sign seen on the island of Cyprus : "Caution: Road Slippery from Grapejuice" MORE OF AN AD THAN A SIGN, but... A billboard seen next to the highway, travelling from Johannesburg International Airport into town. An Ad for BMW showing a photo of a BMW 328i convertible with the roof and all the windows down. The caption reads: "Our hardware runs better without WINDOWS!" Two signs found on top of one another in a country kitchen several years ago: restrooms <----- Please wait for hostess to seat you. Sign in front of church in Montpelier, VT: Bingo Friday night at 8:00pm Quickies Thursday at 7:30pm. Seen in a health food store: "Shoplifters will be beaten over the head with an organic carrot." "Children left unattended will be towed at parents expense." I went to a little hole-in-the-wall restaurant: "Women are not served here... You have to bring your own."