Eskimos use refrigerators to stop their food from freezing.

Jewish Doctors The following quotes were taken from actual medical records from Israeli hospitals... • Between you and me, we ought to be able to get this lady pregnant. • She is numb from her toes down. • By the time he was admitted, his rapid heart had stopped and he was feeling better. • Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year. • On the second day the knee was better and on the third day it had completely disappeared. • She has had no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night. • The patient has been depressed ever since she began seeing me in 1983. • Patient was released to outpatient department without dressing. • I have suggested that he loosen his pants before standing and then, when he stands with the help of his wife, they should fall to the floor. • The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed. • Discharge status: Alive but without permission. • Healthy appearing decrepit 69 year-old male, mentally alert but forgetful. • The patient refused an autopsy. • The patient has no past history of suicides. • Patient has left his white blood cells at another hospital. • The patient`s past medical history has been remarkably insignificant with only a 40 pound weight gain in the past three days. • She slipped on the ice and apparently her legs went in separate directions in early December. • The patient experienced sudden onset of severe shortness of breath with a picture of acute pulmonary oedema at home while having sex, which gradually deteriorated in the emergency room. • The patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch. • The patient was in his usual state of good health until his aeroplane ran out of gas and crashed. • When she fainted, her eyes rolled around the room.