The warriors of Attila, king of the Huns, (A.D. 450) preserved their meat by placing fresh meat under their saddles. All the bouncing squeezed fluids from the meat, and the horse's sweat salted the meat and removed more moisture. When the warrior stopped to eat, they had a dried and salted meal.

A guy has celery sticking out of one ear, lettuce out of the other, and a zucchini up his nose.He goes to the doctor and asks him what`s wrong.The doctor tells him, "Well, for one thing, you`re not eating right."